Thursday, 01 October 2020
Written by Sandra Fitzpatrick   

TakersTakers is a completely unsatisfying heist film that insists on “taking” your time and “taking” your money but doesn’t give anything in return. In fact the characters in this film aren’t the only criminals – anyone making a profit off of this clichéd and hackneyed film should be tried and convicted.

Takers walking the walkThe plot surrounds a group of dapper young criminals who dress snazzy and each have a fancy car to suit their personality - think Oceans Eleven but with guns and violent tempers. The chance of a lifetime to score a multi-million dollar robbery is at their fingertips, but there’s a catch – it means they have to trust a former member of the gang who got caught and did hard time for them. So is the deal legit, or is he planning a little revenge? Throw in a hard-boiled detective played by Matt Dillon, and maybe a dirty cop or two and you have a cocktail of clichés.

TakersTakers wrecked what could have actually been a decent film with sloppy editing and undeveloped characters. Actors like Paul Walker are featured prominently on the poster, but I can’t recall a single thing about his character. Hayden Christensen (Anakin Skywalker himself) does little other than pout look dashing in his bowler hat.

And then there are the characters who do things so frustratingly stupid you just can’t wait for them to die. In one scene, someone throws himself in the line of fire for the others – all underscored by touching music and slow motion video. It’s supposed to be an emotional moment, but it just felt cheesy to me because I didn’t care about any of the characters.

I guess that’s the way I would describe this movie… People I don’t care about, doing things I don’t care about.